There are many a-great films out there, most of which have already been found and given their due respect since time immemorial. But some other great films are sadly forgotten by history, they aren't so commonly featured in fancy articles and intellectual discussions, they are just lost somewhere along the bends of an ever-changing river... So it's a very good thing indeed that this wasn't the case with the film I wanna talk about today. Because anyone with a shred of common sense in his reptilian brain will know that Anaconda from 1997 is objectively one of the greatest films in the history of cinema, in fact I'd go so far as to say it could easily have been directed by Snakely Kubrick, and it's not even a question of mere opinion. Well, it is but you'll have the wrong one if you disagree with me on this. In any case, I will try my best to explain and praise this colossal film, though due to its highly complex nature, I'll inevitably come up short. And its great nature slithers through my understanding in two distinct ways – one, because as a kid I loved questionable movies about giant beasts, snakes most of all, and two, because in recent years, after being mesmerized by nostalgia into rewatching this masterpiece over and over, I came to realize just how perfect it is. So having recently rewatched it for the, I dunno, tenth time maybe, but for the first time since I've had this blog, I will now attempt to finally put my thoughts about this film to rest, in the hopes that nothing I have to say will be particularly new to anyone who has eyes to see.
Our heroes, whom I will from henceforth refer to as argonauts, aren't there for snakes though, they are there to find and hopefully study a mysterious tribe called the Shirishama, also known as the people of the mist, who reside somewhere in the illusive and almost supernatural rivers of the Amazon. And that's when the film's star shines brightest because the cinematographer didn't hiss at the chance of shooting on location, and thus we are constantly admiring some very impressive aerial shots of the river, faintly lit by innocent purple dawns and smothering orange dusks, with its deep dark waters bending and curving in swirls not entirely unlike those of a snake's body, almost as if the river itself is the true warrior snake, beautifully yet strangely adorned with the bizarre vegetation of old trees and crooked branches, much like what you'd expect to see from the rituals of an ancient religion lost in time... In essence, the film's cinematography is expertly crafted, even to the point where this film isn't even on the same league as its sub-genre companions, all of which really sets the tone for a never before seen creature that has made its home somewhere people simply don't go, and not even our argonauts would not have dared set sail there, except due to the strange machinations of the film's true villain – Paul Serone.
The face that launched one ship
On that note it could be said the film follows a really neat archetypal trope in the sense that our group of argonauts quickly find themselves having swallowed more than they can digest, suddenly realizing they are in a dangerous place to begin with, though made much more dangerous by the constant manipulation and misdirection of this seemingly kind, though very odd, wandering stranger. Because let's face it, it's Jon Voight who makes this film. In many ways he's the true snake, and if the snake can be said to be a demonic metaphor, then it's Serone who's the Devil. In fact, as Denise, the pretty production manager in mourning, says – It was you who brought that snake... You brought the Devil! So in that sense we have the opening crawl's first paragraph playing out, we begin to observe these upbeat characters becoming submerged in a hidden reality they never dreamed would be remotely true. There can't be snakes out there that big, and the big ones that do exist don't hunt humans, and they surely don't hunt them out of malice in their cold, dead hearts. But maybe these anacondas are different, maybe these ones aren't even animals in the strictest sense of the word, they are indeed warrior snakes, gods to whom the tribes pay the utmost respect, either out of a true and somewhat sadistic sense of suffering, or out of a distinctly fearful respect. If this sounds like my own headcanon it's because it sort of is, but it's not without foundation because the film does hint at such ideas, elevating this sub-genre into something far more interesting than the typical science fiction plots we commonly find.
And in simpler terms, the story is rather refreshing to see as well. First of all, we expect professor Cale to be the hero, what with his cool confidence and incredible smarts, immediately and consistently proving his bravery to the crew and rekindling his passion with Jennifer Lopez's character Terri. But as it turns out, Serone realizes early on that he won't be able to match Cale's leadership skills and wits, so he has to take him out of the equation, which he does in spectacular fashion by placing a venomous wasp inside the scuba gear, which then found its way into Cale's throat. After an emergency tracheotomy, the good doctor is essentially out of the film and it's up to Terri to take leadership alongside Ice Cube's Danny, her right-hand man, in yet another refreshing twist of not having the friendly male and female leads blossoming into a completely needless romance. There's still a romance though, but it's reserved for Owen Wilson's Gary and Kari Wuhrer, the previously mentioned production manager Denise. But their romance is sadly ended by Serone's manipulation of Gary, who is tempted into unleashing his own devilish greed. And then last but not least, when it comes to Jonathan Hyde's Westridge it's rather amazing to see him gradually put aside his fancy and pretentious self, at least for the time being, so as to give way to a much more confident and courageous man of action. Because initially the man inspires a strong dislike, being rude to baggage handlers, to Denise by assuming she's the bellhop, to Terri by insulting her previous documentary work, and even to Ice Cube's music if you can believe that. However, having been slowly humbled, both by Serone and by the anaconda itself, who impossibly spits a dead monkey at his face as the poor man kneels to pick up his fallen medication, Westridge then rises as a strong man of action, even going so far as to sacrifice himself in what was the film's most spectacular death, in an impossible, and thus mystic, waterfall.
Serone witnessing the impossible waterfall
This shot is in reverse for some reason, but it looks bizarrely cool
This shot always terrifies me
And so that waterfall is perhaps the most symbolically significant, although still profoundly surreal, moment in the film. Because indeed the film does something amazing in that it chooses a place in the real world but opens up the floodgates to give way to the possibility that all the myths and legends just might be true, it could well be that around the river bend, just past that ominous snake totem, is a never before seen section of the Amazon, a hideout where giant warrior anacondas rule the realm and, though the natural ones are fascinating predators in their own right, these ones hunt with an unceasing appetite and an almost perfect awareness of where their prey lies at all times. Again, as my own headcanon I like to imagine Serone's attempts at entering these forbidden anaconda-infested rivers all failed due to his evil intentions of capturing a living river god, subduing it and selling it. Perhaps it's why he abandoned Danny Trejo's character, who dies miserably in the opening scene of the film when an unseen anaconda hunts him down in an act that seems more like divine retribution than hunger. And indeed, as the man clutches to a cross and recites the Lord's prayer in brazilian portuguese, the anaconda swirls around him, initially catching the corner of his eye, effectively becoming the all-seeing camera itself.
But perhaps it's Serone's treachery that is really snakelike... We soon discover that this was his plan all along, to have Mateo become the guide of this naive documentary crew so as to coincidentally rescue him along the way, who would then slowly but surely usurp control of the ship, thereby being granted access to the secret section of the river temple, making the ship his very own trojan horse. This interpretation could also go to great lengths to explain why the anaconda waited around Serone's old safehouse, almost as if suspiciously waiting for someone else to come along, and when three men did, it's almost as if it waited to attack Mateo specifically, and moreover, when Danny went to look for him, he suspiciously tripped on something that refused to attack him... It's almost like the snake gods are exacting revenge by hunting down the three men holding one of their babies in the picture, and they will stop at nothing until they are all dead. Unfortunately for our crew, due to their ignorance, they associated themselves with these evil men and thus had to be tested, a baptism by snake if you will. That is why Gary, having fallen to Serone's charms, was the first member of the documentary crew to die, perhaps deservedly so, though he redeemed himself by saving Denise.
“Wow, that's a big snake!” – BoneSaw557's friend
And when the film comes to its final showdown it does so to great effect. After initially defeating Serone, though not killing him, he comes back in an ambush, snaky as always, and prepares Terri and Danny as his human sacrifices. He does so in yet another seemingly impossible location, almost a factory of sorts, which in a way could be yet another one of his safehouses, but that deep into the river and Shirishama territory it seems difficult to believe. Instead I like to see this place as the metaphorical synthesis between the physical reality of the Amazon and its massive green anacondas, with the alternative mystical reality of hidden tribes and river deities. Because this place, the waterfall, the river itself ever since they went past the snake totem, none of those things exist, they are dreamlike places for our argonauts to face their final challenge. And though at least one snake was previously killed, this time we either find a stronger, more ferocious beast, or perhaps it's the previous one simply resurrected with the same ease with which it shed its green skin in favor of a menacing black and red pattern.
If you are hunted down by a giant anaconda, be advised to check yourself before you wreck yourself
Terri and Danny manage to escape by working as a team, much like Serone previously mentioned it was required to do in order to capture an anaconda. In doing so they manage to trap Serone, letting the anaconda do the rest... So it would seem Serone's greed finally catches up to him as the black anaconda swiftly hunts him and coils itself around him, breaking his bones and bursting his vessels, and then eats him, swallowing him whole in a matter of seconds, very much unlike real anacondas do, and then even weirder, the anaconda still wants more and begins to hunt down Terri and Danny. As unrealistic as all of this is we're now way past realism, we ain't in the Amazon no more... The truth is all our argonauts have defiled holy ground, they have disrespected the river and so they are now tested by its protector one last time. And as Terri is chased, in what is perhaps one of the greatest scenes in the history of cinema, the anaconda regurgitates Serone's slimy body, who falls to his knees and gives one last cheesy wink at Terri. And I think that's a very deep moment in the film... Then it all builds to its epic climax when the anaconda is lit on fire and cooked alive in an explosion, after which, still on fire, it uses the last of its vital force to chase Terri, though in the end, in those very same green waters where it made its home, it also makes its grave. Luckily for Terri, who desperately swims away with no other recourse left, the anaconda seems to finally perish and is ultimately defeated after a totally unexpected jump scare when it is finished off by Danny.
Can a movie be any good if it doesn't end with a giant flaming anaconda?
And then, after an epic journey not entirely unlike that of any other great odyssey in literature, our argonauts are blissfully visited by the illusive Shirishama tribe, seemingly being granted the honor of their presence after defeating the true villain, but not the anaconda... They were honored for defeating the evil poacher Serone, the anaconda's death was only a necessary punishment for their actions, even if done out of ignorance, and a test of their bravery, much like Odysseus' scylla. So yes, this film is indeed a great epic masterpiece. It tells an archetypal story rich with meaning, a tale of mankind's unfailing courage and the unquenchable thirst in our unceasing pursuit of knowledge, but also of our dark side such as our selfishness and unfailing greed. Couple that with the beautiful cinematography, the surprisingly deep character development for such a brief runtime, the instrumental soundtrack full of tribal themes but also with sharp sudden sounds, and the decidedly creepy presence of the anaconda's beautiful animatronic puppet, combine all that and you'll have a flawless masterpiece, a film you can watch time and time again, as I often do and still find something new each time, especially in Jon Voight's hilariously enthralling presence. So it is my honor to proclaim Jon Voight's Anaconda to be the biggest and greatest... film of all time.
Oh, and by the way, this is not an April Fools joke.
Comments
Post a Comment